I have recently found that Instagram has accounts that are dedicated to uplifting others by using the word of God, and that I notice that some of my Facebook friends post their testimonies on how great God has been to them. But there are some people who see these posts and may even take the time to tap “like” on the post, but leave their faith in the dark.
I was one of those people. The struggle to repost was real. And I’ll tell you why I believe people are afraid of talking about God.
The entire concept of being afraid of speaking or posting about God is all rooted in, of course, fear. Fear of rejection from others, not being understood, being labeled a “Jesus Freak”, false perceptions of being a boring individual, or making yourself believe that you now have to be perfect in order to talk about God are some of the reasons why people may praise God behind closed doors. Or at least these were my reasons.
I had a blog identical to this one about 7 years ago. I was only in 8th grade but even then I had a strong connection with my spirit and God. I simply just wanted to inspire people and let them know about God’s grace. I was no expert (and never will be) about uplifting others, but I just always had a strong desire to help. But I constantly worried about people labeling me as a “Jesus Freak” and thinking I would be judging every action of theirs. Talking about God in middle school wasn’t the “coolest” thing, so I just kept my mouth closed. At the time I didn’t realize that loving God whole-heartedly wasn’t a bad thing, and that I could never judge anyone’s actions because I am also a sinner, but I continued to let doubt and fear into my mind.
Eventually, I gave up after only a couple of months of blogging material that no one knew about because I was afraid to tell anyone about it. But I always knew I still wanted to help in some type of way. Between the time of 7 years ago and today, I have written poetry whenever I was going through trying times for therapeutic purposes. I also wanted to one day publish a book of my poetry to help others through their trying times.
But the urge to blog again came back around fall of 2015. This time around I told myself I have to just do it! I acknowledged my fears and told myself that I would have to push past every negative emotion that came about. God brought it to my attention that there was no harm in what I was doing and that I should never be fearful of speaking about the greatness of His doing. I realized that I don’t have to fear because God will always have my back and as long as my intentions are good, I won’t have to care for opinions or hide in the dark about my faith. It is my duty as a child of God to tell people about Him, so I’ll be iight.
This is a side of me a lot of people don’t know about because of my fears. I’m too blunt with my words sometimes and I haven’t always been a chipper person, which made me feel as if I was unqualified for this, but nah, I know me and I know what God is doing in this soul of mine.
I mean really, people will always have something to say, but when you live in your truth words cannot shake you. I love Wale’s song “The White Shoes” where he says “ Take this good advice. Cause they gonna judge you for life, say we can’t always be fly, but we gon’ be good long as them sneakers white”. This REALLY spoke to me. To me the white shoe was a symbol of our heart and intentions that we keep with us everyday ,and we have to keep them “white” to continue gracefully without interruption from the dirt that comes on our personal journeys. (even though I know that wasn’t EXACTLY his message).
And generally speaking, never, I mean NEVER be afraid to do what is thriving in your heart. I mean who knows how many people I could have inspired if I hadn’t given up?
We all have a special light, and mine was God using my love of writing along with my desire to help others through my relationship with Him that would shine brighter than any fear of mine.
Talking about God is not the way of the world and it won’t always get you the most likes on Instagram, but I am not of the world, so I’ll continue to shine my light and shut out any fear that may come for me. I am not quitting, not this time. And I am not ashamed to say I love God either.
And one thing I realized is that the fears that I had before I had never even experienced, so I gave up due to events that I had never even occurred.
That’s what fear does to us people.
Ultimately, my goal is to see you bloom and push past any hardship that you are facing or have faced. If I can inspire at least one person, then my dream would have come true in that moment. I will be as honest with my words as possible, and I hope I touch whoever God brings to this blog.